Monday, June 26, 2006

Encuentros

I was reading a blog from a Brazilian writer last evening when I came across a word that struck accord with a thought or theme I had been developing, "encontros" or encounters. I have been talking for some time with some close friends of mine about the significance of the influence of others in our lives, not solely how a persons mannerisms change because of their influences, but because of the paths our lives take with their direct manipulation.

During the beginning, I was always hoping and thinking that I was in direct control of my life, I wanted to believe it. Reading and studying eastern and western religions, I was gaining insight that I didn’t know would influence my thoughts so much later in life – but they ran through the area of my mind that I couldn’t yet reach, that I couldn’t light enough to flip through the pages.

My original discussions with some friends of mine revolved around a topic that I had previously thrown about with my athletics coach while living in Spain. During the drives to and from Madrid while living in Aranjuez, we spoke often about life, using running as a microcosm. But one place where we continued to stop was in a person’s destiny, or rather created destiny. So these conversations resurfaced while sitting in a little tea shop in Cincinnati.

Sitting and speaking with Ionella, a very beautiful and spiritual Romanian woman, while sipping a subtle white tea, I brought up what I thought was the personal control of ones destiny. My belief was that the positives and negatives in life were a direct result of my decisions and interactions; the more positive situations in which I placed myself, the more positive return I would have upon my life and the opposite, the more negative situations, the more that side will act upon my life. But that is only part of it. Placing yourself in situations just allows the people in those circles to influence your life.

As I was running through City Park in Denver I was retracing the steps that I had taken to get there. I remember so many times people asking me what I wanted to do with my life, what my goals were. I never had any life goals like what it was that I wanted to do with my life. I just wanted to follow the pulse of the wind, el latido del viento. I never worded it in my answers that way, but that is the way I now understand it.

So while running through the park just before flying to Cincinnati to see my parents as well as some friends I began thinking about how it was that I arrived at that moment. A good friend was the first name that came to mind. I met him in Spain while I was living and studying in Alcalá de Henares. We became friends sitting in a café bar smoking hand rolled cigarettes and sipping Grand Marnier. Later it was through him that I was able to procure short-term housing after deciding to stay in Spain after I could no longer live with my host family.

So here I was in Denver after interviewing for a teaching job and having worked for about two months at Legacy H.S. I was working in Cincinnati, OH at a local running specialty store and running. I was having a sort of life crisis: what was I doing in developing myself further working in a running store running? Everything was running. I had never liked being one dimensional, but here I was leading myself in that direction. On a trip to New York City, I quit running. I had to find something else that would allow me to develop another aspect of my life. I had even met with Sid, another friend, to discuss career options and grad school plans. Not too long after these talks, Josh called and asked if I had any interest in moving to Colorado and teaching high school Spanish. It was almost jokingly stated, but there was some sincerity in the offer. He asked the person who had mentioned it to him, and three weeks later I was making phone calls, having interviews, and seeing mountains on the nearing horizon. I quit the Running Spot in early January and was crashing my cousin’s house in Superior, CO in late January to be able to start the second semester teaching at the high school.

On the short spring break, I was going to fly home. I stayed with Josh the evening before my flight and that morning while he was helping a friend move, I went for a run in City Park.

That run I ran through a continuous list of people that had prepaired me for each step I took in life or somehow lead me to the path that I was following, many of whom I will mention in future text. I came to believe that I was not in sole control of my life, but rather responsable for it. I may place myself in good situations in life but it is those people who I meet there that must act upon my life, and those are the people, in addition to those with whom they interact, that are going to become part of my life, thus changing its daily destinations and future encounters.